4 love-themed playlists for haters, strippers & friends

And one litmus test for your potential life partner.

By The FADER

4 love-themed playlists for haters, strippers & friends

design by Sabrina Kaune

Welcome to Love Week, a week-long, mini package of features dedicated to all things romantic in music and culture. We've curated playlists of our favorite love (and anti-love) songs, dug deep into legendary sex anthems, and created instructionals on how to write a proper love letter. Whether you're coupled up or single, let us help you get into the mood.

Playlists about romantic love are a dime a dozen so for Love Week, The FADER staff got together to figure out what else about love hasn't yet been covered (or if they have, not yet stamped with our taste). Ahead, you'll find the results of our brainstorming: songs for Valentine's Day non-believers, a litmus test for your potential life partner, odes to friendship, the second powerful force of intimacy, and the playlist we'd play if we were running a strip club.

Cady Siregar's Valentine's Day playlist for non-believers

"Look, Valentine’s Day is overrated and not real. Research shows there's a sizable percentage of people actually breaking up on or around Valentine’s Day. I myself broke up with a partner of two years on Valentine’s Day 2022 because it was against the heightened backdrop of an admittedly fake holiday “celebrating” romance that his inability to be an empathetic, caring partner was made glaringly obvious to me. And it’s inevitable that the pressures of the day will lead to disappointment. My suggestion for an alternative Valentine’s Day: Make yourself a solo steak dinner, buy a bottle of wine, and watch Secretary starring James Spader and Maggie Gyllenhaal. While you’re cooking, listen to a selection of cuts that cast an eye roll and a yawn over the very idea of a day that forces pink and red hearts down your throat: the sad-happy of Carly Rae Jepsen, the sensitive earnestness of The Sundays, the violent melancholy of The Smiths. Whether you want to send a telepathic middle finger to an ex or wallow in your sadness, there’s a song for every anti-Valentine’s day advocate." —CS

Steffanee Wang's love songs for friends

"In 2020, The Atlantic published a story that wondered “what if friendship, not marriage, was at the center of life?” Interviewing people who’ve chosen to spend their lives with friends, it posited that a platonic connection, rather than romantic, could offer a similar kind of fulfilling intimacy — one that’s built on a love that’s exclusive of whatever we’ve come to associate with the bedroom. I can’t say I’ve rearranged my life to become one of these people, but the story did profoundly change my perspective on the actual value of friendship. As I get older, it’s time with my friends, I realize, that nourishes the parts of me that my (still very fulfilling) romantic relationship just can’t quite reach: group dinners, cry sessions, quiet evenings in just watching a movie. In many ways, the way a friend sees you feels all the more precious and disarming — and these songs, from Lucy Dacus, Samia, serpentwithfeet, Dijon, and more — replicate that feeling for me." —SW

Jordan Darville's stripper anthems from the blog era

"Far too many strip clubs are filled with the same sounds — thudding frat EDM, orgiastic electro-pop, and every popular variant of Atlanta trap. You can’t blame dancers and DJs from sticking with what works, but there’s a near-decade of sexy music being overlooked: the blog era. Songs released from (roughly) 2006-2016 are getting a cultural reappraisal, and hopefully they’re already on their way to pole-dancing class playlists and VIP rooms around the country. But if they’re not, here’s a couple dozen tracks to get things (literally) in motion." —JD

Raphael Helfand's litmus test for life partners

"If you’re like me, you’re looking for a life partner who will sit through hours of punishing music with you. Here are 10 songs, all harrowing in their own ways: the shattering harsh noise from John Wiese, Wolf Eyez, Merzbow, Aaron Dilloway, and Pharmakon; walls of drone from Sunn O))); deeply unsettled art-rap from Fatboi Sharif and Roper Williams; a self-hate anthem from Uniform; 20 minutes of fart jokes and medieval ramblings from Scott Walker; and a horrifyingly bleak holy blues cover from Reverend Kristin Michale Hayter.

"Hit play on a first date at a chic cocktail bar, ignoring the inevitable complaints from tasteless customers and waitstaff. Watch your potential spouse’s face carefully. If they wince, give them a moment to recover, and then look for the telltale nod that means they’re locking in. If they continue to show discomfort, press pause, pay the check, and politely take your leave. If they seem to be enjoying themselves excessively, they’re either lying or an actual psychopath (in which case, leave immediately and without paying). It won’t be easy, but getting through the whole 110-minute affair together will be unimpeachable evidence of a love connection — or, at the very least, a trauma bond. Even if things don’t ultimately work out, you’ve only wasted the run time of a medium-length feature film, which is really not so bad, all things considered." —RH